How to overcome fear and meet a girl
Men in history have been given the place of brave heroes, making exploits, fighting enemies in unequal battles, conquering the tops, saving the disaster. Why, when it is a good opportunity to meet a girl, the young man begins to be panicky afraid to approach the young lady? Where does this fear come from?
Reasons
Since childhood, the boy was taught not to shed tears for nothing, not to show fear of anything. Adults said: a man should not be a coward, he does not give up on the difficulties.
The boy grows up confident that he cannot show excessive weakness or demonstrate his feelings to others. And suddenly he meets a beautiful girl, who conquers him at a glance. Passions rage inside, but the young man remembers that it is undesirable to show his weakness (love), because he is a real man. And passion gradually develops into fear of getting acquainted first.
Only some of them skillfully hide this fear by wearing the mask of "shirt boyfriend" and "balagura", while others remain aside, continuing to worry and worry, and in the end for a long time do not dare to enter into a relationship with the opposite sex.
The reasons for such uncertain behavior can be different.
"We tried, we know."
They say, "Until you know what's waiting for you, there's nothing to be afraid of." Fear appears after the first unsuccessful attempt. Memories of how a strange girl in childhood, scornfully shrieking lips in response to the proposal to meet and play together, turned away, even without trying to hide his disdainful attitude, can torment the young man in his youth and adult life.
An unsuccessful dating experience, which has caused ridicule or just ignorance, is remembered for a long time and becomes an obstacle to starting a relationship. Fear of being ridiculed again desperately slows down all attempts to get acquainted and start communicating with the beloved one. Even if the young man dreams of getting acquainted, his inner voice constantly says: "Don't come near, don't talk - what if she laughs at you again? And the young man has no choice but to continue to be afraid to talk to the girl.
Low self-esteem
"She's like a princess from a fairy tale, and who am I? Shy loser," says the guy who's insecure. Where did you get those thoughts from? Most likely, the young man has heard from parents, teachers, and friends many times that he needs to correct the existing shortcomings - laziness, lack of commitment, lack of purpose.
Yes, what can be dissatisfied with others! But the fact is that a potential girlfriend is unlikely to suspect how much everything needs to be corrected in the character of the guy. And it is not a fact that she herself does not have an endless number of bad habits, and the character is not angelic.
While the young man will continue to punish himself for his own inclinations, seeming to others bad, he never learns that the relationship between young people could well have been formed and even grow into a deep feeling, despite a bunch of shortcomings.
How to stop being afraid of girls
There are a lot of advice on how to overcome shyness and fear when getting to know girls, but not all of them are effective. If the reason why the guy continues to be afraid of new relationships has been identified, it will not be so difficult to solve the problem.
The negative experience of acquaintance and communication stops every time you want to know the name of the beautiful lady, not to mention to call the girl first? Training from the "guru" of the pickup truck will help: not paying attention to the fear that hinders the movement, to smile to all the girls who come across the way. At the same time, we should strive to look into the eyes of young women, looking away only after 2-3 seconds.
Among the many women there are at least one or two who will answer to a sincere smile and look. It's time to start getting to know them.
You don't have to come up with clever phrases or too original actions. A compliment on the charming smile or the trivial question of "how to get into... the library" is enough. You do not need to pounce on the girl immediately with questions about her life, interests, just to support a casual conversation about the weather or a sensational event, which she probably knows about.
Another option to stop being afraid to meet girls is to do autotraining. It is not for nothing that they say that thoughts and words materialize with time: there is a lot of evidence for this.
You can not dare to approach a girl for months and years, but it is better to repeat systematically and persistently: "I can", "I can", "I can", "I am sure". In the end, the young man will gain the desired self-confidence.
And she, in turn, will give the opportunity not to be afraid of new acquaintances and build a relationship with the girl on its own, suitable for both, the scenario.
As any new business, acquaintance with girls should be studied. It will be helped by rehearsals in front of the mirror: a light smile and an interested look, perhaps, will turn out not the first time.
It is good to think through and learn the first few phrases that will definitely interest the young lady. Of course, one sentence is not enough, so you should decide on what topic to talk to your favorite girl - movies, music, gadgets, games - and try to be sufficiently aware of these issues.
Helps easy communication sense of humor. A relevant joke, an anecdote in the theme will help to charm the young charming woman and present yourself in a much more favorable light.
It is also important how the young person looks like. Dirty clothes, unshaven chin, unclean shoes, bad manners - these seemingly trifles will immediately cause a negative assessment on the part of the girl, and to correct the first impression is no longer possible.
The rules of successful acquaintance with girls are simple and available. To overcome the fear of potential relationships will help the above recommendations, it is only necessary to make an effort to do so.